Sunday, February 3, 2008

no one told me it is personal

Writing is so much more personal than I ever imagined. It makes me feel open and vunerable in a way that I am not used to feeling. It has me wondering if I want to continue with this whole blog thing.

I have a couple of friends who are far away, and they enjoy reading the blog to see what I am up to. I have a couple more people I have met through knitting adventures on line, and we enjoy each others daily blog posts. What I am not ready for are people who read the blog and then see me, face to face.

This has happened 2 times at local yarn shops. "Are you the Terri that....?" "Yes, that is me." And then again yesterday. I posted a comment on a blog, not realizing my blog was linked to the comment. When I saw this person she mentioned that she had taken a quick peek. I was mortified. What had I written? Nothing mean or spiteful, but what about quality and spelling and dangling participles? What about wine consumption and swearing? Then there is the whole revealing aspect of it all. What have I revealed online that I would be uncomfotable revealing in a casual conversation?

The truth is I need to get over it. Writing is personal. People I meet through writing are going to know me in ways I am not comfortable with. The same thing is probably true in reverse. It is a courageous stretch we make, to meet people and make art and trust we will not be hurt. I am still not comfortable with it, but I am willing to try.

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